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The definition of success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. But how do we gauge our success?
In school I learnt the SMART criteria for goal setting. A goal should be specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time sensitive. So, you create a goal and with this criteria you have a way to measure it's success.
But how do you measure succes for more complex or ambiguous goals? How do you measure the success of a marriage - in years together - by how many fights you've had or didn't have? What about being a successful parent? By your child's behaviour - their grades - their career choices? Things are not so cut and dry.
What if we choose the wrong measurement of success? What if the measurement is fine but our goal is unrealistic?
Take weight loss. We have a specific goal - a weight, a time frame to achieve it, it is measurable by weighing ourselves at regular intervals, and it is achievable with the right effort to change the way we eat and adding more exercise. The problem is often that our goals are not realistic. The weight we want to achieve is not realistic, or it is not realistic within our self-imposed time frame, or with the planning and effort we are willing to put in.
What if we change the criteria? What if instead of focusing on the number on the scale as my measure of success, I chose to base my success on the effort I am putting into all aspects of my health instead of just my weight? What if my success was measured in how many times I got back up after I failed - or the good habits I am creating - or the effort I put into my health? It's much harder to fail when you are basing your success on the effort you are putting in rather than the results. What if we based our success on how many times we make the healthy choice - or get in a workout or a walk or some form of self care? The results on the scale will follow if we put our effort and focus on the steps to get us there.
It is the same with any goal. So, wish it, dream it, then make a plan to crush it! 👊👍
Very well written! I agree that success should be measured by effort, not achievement. Being the best floor sweeper because of fine tuning every skill required is no less successful than becoming a neurosurgeon!
ReplyDeleteI love this, and I am loving your blog so far. I remember learning about SMART too, but it's true, how do you measure more intimate goals such as parenting, relationships, etc. The key is not to measure it based on outcome, but rather effort and intention. With my weight, I focus on the the goal as a lifetime of health and so changing anything isn't for a specific time, not a month or six months, but slow and continuous. Of course, I could measure that lifetime goal by setting a pair of jeans I want to fit into, but it allows room to change my mindset, whereas time constraints don't always work out and if you miss it, it can have a negative impact on your mindset. Thanks for this! <3
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